Unraveling of misfortune

Crazy how I got to know a girl a little I thought liked me but if I decide to do gaming and not check my phone for a portion of the day I get blocked. Anyone who’s gonna send 6 messages without a response should take a hint maybe I’m busy and they need to entertain themselve!

I’d love to have a girlfriend but not if I can’t enjoy my gaming or any form of entertainment for 6 hours of the day. I’m baffled how fast things lasted before I didn’t matter anymore, it’s super crappy to me!

Girls are rarely into me and if they are I’m lucky if it lasts more than a few days or months in real life or social media. Not sure if it’s an aspie thing or just part of quarantine where people are more on edge especially with lack of things to do during where as I’m golden for as long as I need to.

Lastly I know I don’t blog much I’m sorry for that sometimes I have a subject that puzzles me with massive confusion and a little bit of anger. Maybe it’ll be easier for me one day in terms of relationships for now I’ll remain lonely.

Reawaken the quirky guy

Barely been in healthy enough mindset due to lockdown, so tired of living with my mom and sister they can be so hard to be around. I’m lucky to have plenty of entertainment for ions, I’d be a hella of a lot worse without my comforts.

Such an unfortunate and ghoulish thing how I feel so unwanted by hundreds of people, I’d do anything to get some good things to come my way! I wish I could also apologize to everyone whom expects more from me and thinks I’m capable of things that, well aspies aren’t packed with skills plus not a pedophile like some think!

Just a form of my venting despite the subject matter although I have had some amazing dreams that very much intrigued my inspiration, I’d totally have at least 15 ideas to pitch if I knew the right people. Hmm the uncertainty is powerful or weak either way I have fun with that.

I don’t know where my mind goes sometimes it unnerves me quite a bit. The realm of light and darkness seeping through opening a covered cave is my life in a nutshell.

I’m sorry I haven’t blogged in awhile!

Been a dreadful time mixed with very few good things especially in the last month! Lots of toxic energy lately that has burrowed into me and made my sleep rough including my IBS. Some crave negative things that have occurred which is mind blowing! It might be just be me but I feel like autistic people don’t have enough positive things happen.

It’s kinda like a never ending fall to an abyss sometimes; I feel like I can’t make it stop. The struggle of being lonely and interacting with people that I shouldn’t is something that feels re entry of poison seeping back in occasionally.

Either way I hope everyone else is doing well, I try to spread positivity to most people. It tends to vary the ones that accept me for the quirky being I am.

The wonder emporium of emotions people deal with especially during quarantine is bizarre! An open book of intriguing traits I am.“I can’t be of a group what am I am”? Great little riddle of a lonely person. I’m packed with confusing things to say I’m sorry for that at least I’ve been safe with endless entertainment of video games and film!

What lovely day it is to be me

A boring day followed by strange interactions and perpetual dark thoughts that flow in like magma! I’m a glorified mystery with a unfortunate knack of upsetting online friends.

I get beyond up with the evil people that lie and don’t care about being my friend especially someone like me that is nice to many kinda like a care bear. What I never fathom is the ones that have Asperger’s and still clash with me!

So ready for the day to come when I can live a more independent life without as much loneliness that haunts me! I guess on the plus side I have a few good people that I can depend on no matter what that’s important, inspirational and heartwarming.

The respective of things are the positives that can be laid out in perfect narratives; I love to fiddle with words sometimes it’s fun and keeps my mind happy. I love the saying at the end of the day it’s not gonna matter, that’s an important lesson I have to remember sometimes! #Autism #Writingcommunity #Venting #Inspiration

Enter the mini portal of my mind

A bizarre interior for imagination and an exterior of a weird skinny guy! Loads of interesting, ambient waves of emotions or somber ones, in my story. Realm of unknown, uncertainty, and unfortunate things I’ve experienced!

The many things I’ve been through since I started special needs class is astonishing along with morbid, and honorable to me maybe others that I’ve made it as far as. Crazy amount of times I’ve been taken advantage or bullied has really discouraged me in a way I wish it didn’t. I might not be best with extraordinary details but I try to express myself with the best of my ability.

My sudden sparks that flow through me is fun creativity of my history. I miss a lot of things even my mom says I should blog about things I miss, I figured I’d do a different one in fact that’s a wonderful thing that’s known “Different not less”! I mean I do miss adventures that’s one thing among many.

I enjoy my peculiar ways although it’d be nice to experience some more independence and other variations of adult things; I often feel not my age of 27 especially the way I live. It’s ok though in due time maybe when the society is at ease again after the collapse of our economy, such an intriguing thing to me at the same time especially in movies about society like Falling Down good times. #Autism #Writingcommunity #Thoughtsfromanaspie #Writer

I wonder what society will be like in the next year when things are different

The stock market has plummeted, drama is infused often, businesses are closing, and more people are dying more! I can only imagine how many people are fed up with quarantine; it’s like if a turtle wanted to make his way through several states.

I’m sure doctors are struggling so much right now or anyone else whom has to work hard during these taxing times. My tedious routine is so tiresome and blistering madness!

Some people are probably satisfied with they’re life I don’t know if I can be happy for awhile. I’m in need of good things to happen soon in any way possible!

Maybe there’s a bigger picture to many things coming kinda like how the name of my blog is meant to be deep which is meant to be profound! I’d love to experience more deep thoughts and connect with others on the same wave link of thought processing. #Autism #Pandemicthoughts #Society #Writercommunity #Writer #Fear

Controversial things are wild and intriguing

So dark, bleak and unorthodox! The way people act when things are slightly wrong or misunderstood is disgusting behavior especially when I barely have good friends on my side.

I love controversial stuff especially in movies or topic that I can learn from so despite the brash things thrown at me like metaphorical tomatoes in a upset audience! It’s unfortunate how #autistic people are barely given chances especially in the worst circumstances where it’s difficult to reason with the person without throwing insults; it’s best to be calm and mature even in disasters important people have to maintain the situation.

Society can be so cruel and provocative I’m uncomfortable with that. I want wholesome vibes flowing towards me, I hate how hard it is for an aspie like myself to connect with most anyone! I don’t know where my mind goes sometimes but I know my unique ways should be considered important maybe I can blossom even from a bad scenario.

These quarantine times hit some worse than like #Writersblock, pain, drama, and struggle with sleep; I’m implore more imagination! I’m in need of things to be easier no matter what that means. #Writercommunity #Controversy #ASD #Fsociety